A bartender from the United Kingdom has invested in a plethora of self medication this evening after having a substantially sh*t day at work.
Forced to pick up extra hours after extreme competition in her chosen industry left her underemployed, Julie Vern, 28, a molecular mixologist based in York, selected several opiates and narcotics totalling a value equal to her days earnings.The dose, suspected to be a heady mix of cocaine, gin, and that half acid tab left over from summer, is now being injested as Vern, a PhD graduate, waits for her wider friendship circle to respond to her unprovoked suggestion to ‘pop over and get on it’.
Vern had her first inclination that the day was a potential write off during an afternoon event at a conference centre on the outskirts of Slough.
Initially expected to be a ‘quick in out’ job, issues soon piled up, including: ‘Where is the fucking stock mate?’, and ‘No, we said 150 not 15’.
She reported:”A cold sweat materialised over my body as I realised I was going to have to wing the fuck out of this and cover for my boss at the same time.
That sweat soon dried however, leaving a vaguely unwashed odour, unreflective of the true amount of time Julie usually goes between showers.
The full extent of tonight’s damage is thought to positively correlate with the distinct lack of organisation exhibited by Julie’s employer, a captain of industry with a penchant for zero hour contracts.
However the longer lasting health and wellbeing issues pertaining to workers on lower and less secure incomes remain unmeasured.